What I Have Been Working On

 

  eye candy

"You have nothing in this world more precious than your children. When you grow old, when your hair turns white and your body grows weary, when you are prone to sit in a rocker and meditate on the things of your life, nothing will be so important as the question of how your children have turned out. It will not be the money you have made. It will not be the cars you have owned. It will not be the large house in which you live. The searing question that will cross your mind again and again will be, How well have my children done?

If the answer is that they have done very well, then your happiness will be complete. If they have done less than well, then no other satisfaction can compensate for your loss." President Gordon B. Hinckley

 Happy Birthday to my Husband today!!!!  He's the best! (quote from one of his favorite movies)

 It seems as though life is going faster and faster everyday.  I have made changes in my schedule to accommodate essentials to help make my life run more smoothly.  It always intrigues me to find such remarkable results with such seemingly small changes.  The key for me always starts with spiritual matters.  If I am not making time to study the scriptures, writing in my journal, and pondering through prayer, my life seems so much more overwhelming.  

I recently wrote about how I had been slacking in this department.  So with a few small course changes, wa-lah,  life runs more smoother, and I feel like I am overall better equipped with accomplishing what my purpose is here on this earth.


I am working on putting together a  "Learning Circle"group for my area, through the Power of Mom's.  Their button is up there to the right.  I am working on becoming a  Learning Circle leader.  I am working on becoming a trainer as well.  They asked me to send in a little video clip of me facilitating.  I pretty much had an internal anxiety attack thinking about doing this.  

Luckily I am married to the worlds greatest trainer.  I mean, he is the Director of Training for the company he works for, so he knows something about the matter.  He is going to help me hone my skills so that I can actually do what I love, effectively.  And that is to help give other Mothers specific tools to help them accomplish their goals to do and be a little better.  I am looking forward to what I will get to learn through the process.  Especially, gaining better skills to help me be a better mother, and wife.  Because at the end of my life I don't want to regret how I raised my children.

A cute little funny:  Yesterday Kady got to go on a field trip with her little pre-school class.  They went to a farm.  When they we learning about the different animals, her teachers were talking about the big momma pig who is pregnant and how she is going to have baby pigs.  Kady, not seeing a daddy pig around inquisitively asked "Where's the husband?" 

Re-Post aaaaannnnnnnd Other thoughts

I was just looking through past posts and came across this one about why mothers need sleep

It helps me feel better about how I have been behaving.  Annnd helps me to laugh at myself instead of getting frustrated that life is not perfect and recognize as mothers and wives our progress should not be measured in any single moment but by the small simple everyday acts of service we render to our families, and ourselves.

Like last week I spent most of my time in time out, because I simply did not feel like yelling at my kids most of their waking hours. 

I should celebrate that instead of saying" I can't believe I was in time out most of the time last week!" 

I should say "I am glad I recognized my inability to cope with constant reminders to particular children and their brain damage  that seemed to be very prevalent last week. 

I could not stand one more "I don't know!" when I asked a child why they were choosing to use their time so poorly.  

I yelped back "What do you mean you don't know?"  I found myself saying in my head "Come on get with the game here.  Put all your marbles back in the jar, tighten all the screws and get back to being you!  please!!"


I would look at the phrases I have all over my house and snap at them as if they were actual humans and tell them they had noooo idea what I was going through so to bug off.  I was on edge.  Lack of sleep was a key factor.  Why, WHY does it have to affects me so much.  It is like a handicap of sorts.  


I found hope from reading through a glorious book by Linda Eyre I had sitting on my book shelf called "I Didn't Plan to Be a Witch and Other Surprises of a Joyful Mother"  This book had my sister and I laughing so hard.  She writes in such a way that makes you realize we all as Mothers go through pretty much the same things and helps put those anxieties of if you are doing enough at bay.  Great read!!!


I am going to go and buy pizza tonight for dinner because I am so sick of cooking.  I know!  Is that possible?  Yes it is.  You have to know when to stop and give yourself a break.  So I am.  Happy weekend!
 

It's that time again

Eliza has been ready to use the potty exclusively for a few months now.  I just didn't prepare myself for it until a couple weeks ago.  What I mean by preparing myself, is that I have to mentally prepare myself for accidents, because they will and do happen.  So 2 1/2 weeks ago off came the diapers and on went the underpants.

For the most part it has been smooth sailing.  It took her about a week to figure out the timing of getting to the toilet in time to poop there.  You would have thought I won the sweepstakes by how excited I got when she got to the toilet all by herself and yelled from it "Momma I poo-poo potty!!!!"  I could have cried I was that happy and excited.

I am so grateful that Sarah over at Clover Lane shared her years of experience in this post    a little more than a year ago.  It was a life saver for me when I potty trained Kady and now Eliza.  Cause in the past with the first 3 children, it was not a pretty sight to watch me potty train the kids.  I nearly went crazy with the thoughts of accidents.  I love how we learn and change and grow.  Anyway, I am off to make lunch and get Lucy to school.

National Entitlement Awareness Day

What if I told you that there was a fool-proof method to becoming the parents you were meant to be.  Would you believe me?  Maybe?  Well it has been my experience in my short years of parenting with my husband that the methods and principles taught in any and all of Richard and Linda Eyre's books provide just that.  And I am sooooooo excited that their newest book "The Entitlement Trap: How To Rescue Your Child with a New Family system of Choosing, Earning and Ownership" is available for pre-ordering now!  HERE is the link to do just that.

AAANNNNDDD if that is not enough

They are doing a Giveaway with a whole lot of wonderfulness!!!!

I had the opportunity last week to hang out with my friend Becky.  (Click her name to go to her blog.  Trust me you won't regret.)  I knew that she had gotten an advanced copy of the Eyre's new book titled "The Entitlement Trap: How to Rescue Your Child with a New Family System of Choosing, Earning, and Ownership"  

So I asked her how her reading was going.  She shared it today on her blog.

I love what Becky wrote about her experience in her reading so far.  She shared what I imagine most of us feel when we realize what we need to be doing better at anything.  Which by the way, she and her husband are AMAZING parents!  Which goes to show that none of us are immune to making improvements in our lives and homes, even if they are fractional.

  

I am very passionate when it comes to families and helping families be the best they can be. So when the Eyre's asked to help spread the word I am more than happy to help.

I hope you take advantage of this opportunity.  Here is one of the reasons they say you need to get this book

"It attacks the biggest parenting problem of our time, and YOU NEED IT even if your kids don’t have an entitlement attitude (because their friends do!)"

 

Happy shopping!!!!!

 

Control Freak!

My Mother-in-law and I were sitting in a Sunday school class several years ago.  The teacher was describing how being a control freak is a form of unrighteous dominion.  My Mother-in-law leans over to me and whispers in a slight sarcastic tone"They make it sound like being a control freak is a bad thing."  We share something in common.  We like to be in control.  Although she seems to know how to do hers in a more dignified manner.  I am still working on that.

Yesterday I started getting our home back in order.  For almost 2 months I had not done any kind of major cleaning.  You know the kind where you get down on your hands and knees and really scrub the crap off of any surface below your waistline.  I love to deep clean.  I feel so empowered and in control.

I paid particular attention to the kitchen floors, baseboard, walls, and under the bar counter where the kids sit.  I had had enough of it looking dingy.  I had focused my energies on making sure I could be there for the kids while they had their summer vacation, that the home had somewhat been neglected.  My thoughts were mostly a "why should I bother" state.  Yes the home would get swept, vacuumed and dishes done nightly, but no real scrubbing was done.  Just the basics. 

I could not belive how unbelievablly distgusting those surfaces had gotten in a relatively short period of time.  I got my empty ice cream bucket, filled it close to 20 times with water and a cleaning solution(clorox's green works love it) and scrubbed my little heart out.  Our baseboards are full of many ridges and so I had to pay special attention to how I cleaned those, if I wanted them to truly look clean. 

I couldn't help but think of how this is so similar to what I do with my own life.  How often have I put off fixing or cleaning up those sins that gunk up the walls of my inner soul?  Although in this particular cicumstance I felt that my hiatus from deep cleaning was justified, how many times though, are there circumstances where I am just being lazy?  My mentality becomes more of putting it off till tomorrow, it will still be there.  Yeah with another layer of sin to clean up too. 

I have a lot to work on.  We all do.  It is part of life.  We will always have things on our to-do lists of life.  I am still figuring out how to make sure what is on my list is what really matters.  Am I prioritizing in the most efficient and effective way to make sure I am accomplishing what really matters most?  How do I not get overwhelmed with all that is required of me? For me it is a constant balancing act.  I think of those big metal scales.  You know those ones where it has two sides.  If you put the same amount of weight on either side the result is perfect balance.  But if you add anything more or less to either side it throws off the balance.

For me spiritually, I have been off balance for quite some time.  Since January.  That's when it seems I had started to neglect doing those simple tasks of studying the scriptures daily and writing in my journal.  I have felt it.  So why am I still not doing anything about it.  Excuses.  I know my life is so much smoother when I incorporate these practices into my life, and yet I am not doing them on a consistent meaningful basis.  So I just need to do it, and get it done.  Repent and do better!

Back to the cleaning.  Here is a not so fun thing about me.  Maybe someone can relate.  Or not. 

I have a problem, and I try so hard not to have it.  After I am done deep cleaning I get easily irritated with my family.  I was even mentally telling myself that it will get messy again, it is just apart of having children.  So don't bite their heads off when they have just spilled their Popsicle juice all over your (you could eat food off of) floor.  I not so nicely remind them to please eat over their plate, because I just spent hours scrubbing the floors so they could be clean.  It is the least they can do, as if they owe me something. I am such a control freak!

You know what is weird to me, is that if Jared is the one who has cleaned floors I don't get upset with our children when minutes after the floors are cleaned they spill something.  Not cool. 

The good news is that typically the day after I have deep cleaned, my control freak ideas subside somewhat, and I go back to be a normal control freak.  Boy do I have a long way to go!

And for your viewing pleasure

This video reminds me that we need to just relax and have fun, even if we look a little silly.  Or should I say especially if we look silly, because heaven knows me doing a jump kick, like Sera does in this video would certainly look down right silly. This was recorded at my sister Kaitlyn and  brother in law Nicks home.  We stopped there on our travels up to Utah.  She made this deliciously homemade ham and cheese stuffed pretzel for dinner.  Nick entertained the girls with their guitar hero games. 
I  love everything about this video. From Emma being so focused in playing the guitar to Sera singing and dancing to Kady dancing briefly with her head before she goes into a state of being in the zone playing her guitar to Eliza walking around with her melted cheese stick from her stuffed pretzle. 

Motherhood is WORK

I am pleasantly exhausted from this summers activities with the kids.  The three older girls went back to school today.  I didn't even cry when I dropped off Lucy for her first day of kindergarten.  Is that bad?  No it is not.  Because I am so thrilled to watch my children grow up.  I have been so pleased at watching each of them grow and learn and figure out how they want to contribute in our home and in society.  I am so excited for the wonderful things they will  accomplish as they grow older. 

This summer has reminded me that motherhood is work.  I knew this coming into my career as a mother, but I never imagined how truly deeply emotional and physical the tasks are of mothers.  Figuring out how to balance 6 very different little peoples needs has been both emotionally and physically taxing for me. 

But I say, bring it on. 

I know that this stage of life with little ones will be gone in a blink of an eye.  I have been constantly reminding myself that this is only the beginning, I better enjoy the journey or I am going to miss out.  I have put simple signs all of the home as visual reminders. 

For example
"Look in their eyes and smile"
"Find the positive"( I look at this one a lot)
"Dance",
"Think before you speak" 
"Be kind"
"Smile" 
"Laugh"
Etc.


I used to be serious when I told people that one more kid after 3 is no big deal.  There is no difference.  I am here to correct myself and say that from 5 to six has by far been the most difficult.  I find myself being pulled in all sorts of directions to help each child with their individual needs.  Then there is always that one child who seems to need triple the amount of time and attention, which leaves me feeling emotionally exhausted at the end of each day.  I am reminded that as long as I am doing the best that I can do then the Lord makes up the difference.  It brings me such comfort in knowing this.   

Especially on those days where it seems that my efforts have fallen very short of what I feel I am capable of.  But, if I sit back though and look at the big picture I realize that that was the best I was able to do that day.  Sure it may pale in compariosion to those days where it seems that everything runs smoothly, but given whatever circumstaces happend that day, I can be happy that everyone was able to have at least 3 balanced meals. 


Not that anyone is asking, but for those who want to know.  I truly feel that our home is complete. 

Seconds after Daniel was born I had such a complete sense of knowing I have done what the Lord has asked me to do, in the realm of what spirits we needed to help bring to this earth.  I realized after this experience, that I had been pregnant 11 times in 11 years! So I am not expecting my body to produce any more little people.  I am so grateful for the experiences I have had with my miscarriages.  As difficult as each miscarriage was, I look back and realize how much each one has helped me develop a faith in knowing that the Lord knows best.  I have learned to trust in His will and timing.

I feel very grateful that I had this experience.  I have many friends who have heavy hearts because they want so badly to have more children, but for unapparent and sometimes apparent reasons have not been able to physically have any more.  I see the struggle they go through and my heart aches for them.

I have been soaking Daniel up since he was born.  He is such a wonderful little person.  I look into his eyes and see wisdom beyond his his mere 8months.  He is an amazing blessing that I am grateful for beyond words.  He recently has started to scoot crawl.  The girls sit and encourage him and he loves giving them these radiant smiles that seem to say, thanks for the help.

Soon the girls will be home from their first day of school.  The home will once again be filled with loud noises.  When that time comes you can be assured that I will be digging back down to those innermost parts of my soul to pull out the strength to get through the rest of the day.  Because for me, the time between 4 and 8 seem to be the hours where meltdowns occur, whining happens, and my brain feels literally like it is going to explode from all the noise. And the children just sit and watch me in amazement.

All kidding aside those hours plain and simple, just seem to be the most difficult.  But like I said earlier.  This stage of life will be gone in a blink of an eye.

Things to look forward to:

-Lucy is in charge of dinner tonight.  She has breakfast food.  The menu is waffles with fresh blueberries and whip cream on top, fluffy scramble eggs, bacon, and hashbrowns.

-Hearing about how the girls first day of school was

-Cuddling with Daniel when I put him down for the night

-Story time at bedtime

-Jared coming home from work

-Snuggling up to him as we fall asleep

Grandpa

My day started off with sad news.  My Grandpa "Santa" passed away earlier this morning.  He was such a great person.  I am so grateful for the influence he had on my life.  A man with a heart to serve those around him.  Thank you Grandpa for having such a positive influence on my life, you will be missed!

A.S.A.P.

At the very beginning of the month, I felt this need to start getting the girls more involved with our dinners.  I came up with the idea to have the girls start helping with meal planning.   I sat down with the 4 older girls individually and had them pick a day of the week they wanted to do and the theme for their day. ( I am working on a menu planning list to share)  I feel like helping teach them the basics about cooking and all that goes along with the process is one of those essential life skills to have.

This is what they came up with.

Sera-Monday- Italian

Emma-Tuesday-Mexican

Lucy-Wednesday-Breakfast food

Kady-Thursday-Grilling

It has been so much fun for me to help them learn how to properly plan and execute their ideas.  One of my favorite things about this have been the opportunities to talk with them individually as we help prepare the meal. 

Last week as Emma was doing prep work for her chicken tacos, we started discussing what has worked for me as a Mother.  I was telling her how, for me, one of the most important characteristics to have, in being a Mother, is that of knowing how to make and keep what I do as simple as possible and still keep the quality of my work.

She responded by saying, "A.S.A.P!"

"Huh?"

"Instead of  As Soon As Possible, it is, As Simple As Possible!  That is what you should call it Mom!"

"That is genius Emma, I love it!"

So now my methods are going to be dubbed ASAP.  ( I want to expand more on this method in later posts)

This experience left me understanding how very intently our children listen to the fine details of our conversations with them.  They necessarily may not here the in between stuff but they hear what is most important.

Life seems to be moving at a light speed pace.  I am realizing more and more how true it is that when your children are younger it really is easier.  Yes it is physically demanding.  But it far outweighs the anxiety I am starting to feel as the children are getting older and I think of all of the changes that take place as one gets older.  And the different experiences they will have to go through to be able to learn and grow to become who they need to be. 

Even though I try to make life as simple as possible there are days that seem to make me question my abilities as a Mother.  Yesterday was one of those days.  And from talking with some of my friends I was not the only one who seemed to have a very off day.

In fact after I got all the kids to bed last night, instead of cleaning stuff up, like I normally do, I sat and just relaxed.  I refused to clean up their messes they had made.  I thought, "It will still be here tomorrow, I need a break!" 

This was hard for me to do, because I so enjoy waking up to a fresh clean home.  But a break was necessary!

This morning it looked like a tornado had run through our home.  I gave the girls a list of what needed to get done before we went swiming with some friends and literally locked myself in my bedroom to finally work on this post.  They had a hour to get it all cleaned up, and I tell you what, I had one of those moments. 

I came downstairs when it was near the time we needed to go and I was so impressed by what I saw.  It looked as if I had cleaned the place. But I didn't!  I started throwing compliments left and right. 

This experience was much needed to boost the moral of the home.  Because any of you Mothers out there know that children indeed get annoyed with each other and will make every effort to torture one another which in turn drives any mother into twitching episodes.  As was the case yesterday for me.  My husband thought it was funny to the point of laughing so hard he turned shades of purple.  Thank goodness for his balance. 

So today I am thankful for the bad days that help me appreciate, that much more, the very good days of motherhood. 

I copied and pasted this last part from my husbands blog and added a few details in yellow: 

The unthinkable happened recently...we got a family picture.  A real one. By a real photographer.  A really talented photographer. here is her link www.momentsbykathleen.com
She also has a realistic perspective on motherhood blog here

Click here to check the out the full set on Flickr.

If you don't have time to see all 126 photos, here are some of my favorites:

Okay this one I have to tell you.  Kathy, our photographer, asked Kady what her favorite food was.  Kady then starts to lick her lips and says "Cotton candy!" and makes a "mmmm" sound.  So cute!

Kathy brought a water bottle and Eliza got a hold of it.  She loved squirting people with it.

I wonder if he is thinking about if baseball will be apart of his future or if he is thinking of how he can get the baseball into his mouth.

Seriously!!!!! I can not get enough of this little boy!  He melts my heart every single day!

Thank you Kathy! 

Palmer Family Summer 2011, photos by Moments by Kathleen -- Prolific Profile, LLC on Flickr.

Encouragment!

Here's a little video clip I get to share

Have a fabulous Thursday!  And remember to keep on going, especially when it gets hard.

Love

The other day I needed to get out of the home with the kids.  They have been out of school for a week now and I allowed us a few days to just do nothing.  My personal timer went off and I knew it was time to get out.  So we ventured out to the big spacious warehouse store to pick up some essentials.  While we were perusing the isles we came upon a sample that was being offered.  Yummy mashed potatoes.  I thought for sure the girls would love it.  They all diod except for Lucy.  She had one bite and curled up her nose and said "I do not like these.  They taste nothing like yours and I love yours!"


Today is Eliza's  2nd birthday !  


I can't believe she is only 2.  No really.  She seems so much older to me and it seems so long ago that I had her.  We had a great day today.  

I was awoken this morning to the sound of Lucy singing happy birthday to Eliza. Eliza interjected her version of the song along with Lucy.  It melted my heart.  After we were done with getting ready for the day we left for a bike ride to the girls school and played on the play ground.  

Kady had fallen three times off of  her bike.  All I have to say is that I am very grateful for whoever invented the helmet.  Because without a helmet, Kady would most likely be brain damaged.  She even did a graceful tuck and roll over her handlebars onto the pavement.  I knew it was coming.  We were heading down a very small hill and she was doing great until the very end where her bike wheels got very wobbly, she raised her feet slightly and then brought her feet down just the wrong way to where they caught on the pavement such that it sent her flying.  I thought for sure she was going to have teeth missing or have some sort of broken bone. Miraculously she did not.  I was so thankful and immediately said a prayer of gratitude, knowing that the outcome could have been tragic if she had fallen a different way.  But like my father-in-law says, kids are pretty pliable.  

After the park we came back home where the older girls made birthday signs while I got lunch together.  After this, my memory is a bit fuzzy.  I just remember a lot of Eliza doing her high pitch scream, which translates into "Get out of my space. NOW!"  She mostly directs this to a certain sibling, who, for one reason or another get's in her space a lot.  I used the squirt bottle a lot today.  In fact I said something to the effect of "Look, I know it is your birthday, but you are still expected to use your words politely, please stop screaming!"  

We had family over for a BBQ and cupcakes.  It was a great time.  I over ate.  Why do I do that?  I mean, it is completely unnecessary.  I need to do better at this when it comes to BBQ's.  There is just something about the combinations of hamburgers, hotdogs, potato salad, and baked beans.  I need to exert  some will power.  Blasted BBQ's

Tonight at bed time we looked at pictures of Eliza from the day she was born. This particular one caught my eye.  For a couple of reasons.  This was taken moments after she came out.  It reminded me of this moment.  Literally my first thought was "Huh she looks a bit like Yoda.  I wonder if her ear will perk up so that she won't look like Yoda."
The other reason is, why do I keep photos of people looking clearly at my business while they are smiling.

Telling Eliza's birth story peeked interest for the older girls.  I got to the point in her birth story of when my doctor broke my water.  When I got up afterward to go to the restroom, I started pooping without any control.  I told Jared "I am pooping!  I am pooping and I can't make it stop!" 

They started asking questions at this point.  One asked, if I thought they would poop while they gave birth to their baby.  Another asked how big their birth canal was and how a baby can fit through there.  And then that spawned the question from another of how many holes we have.  So then another said "So we have three holes?  A pee hole, a birth canal hole and a poop hole?  Wow that's a lot of holes!" 

I must say it was a very interesting evening discussion.  I did tell them that there is nothing in this world that compares to holding that baby in your arms after you have worked so hard to get them here.  Pure joy!

This video was take a couple weeks ago.  Jared got into blowing raspberries on our sliding door with the girls.  He laughed so hard.  This one is of Eliza.

Eliza is such a fun person.  She is full of grit and determination.  She is very sturdily built.  She loves to do things that involve thrill.  She loves to leap onto the couch from the back.  She will pile drive you without any warning.  She LOVES her baby brother Daniel and slathers him with hugs and kisses.  She is very good and saying thank you to me.  It fills me with happiness when I hear her say "tank you momma!"  after I have done something for her.  

Her laugh is so contagious.  It is full of life and yumminess!  She loves water.  She loves to slides.  If she doesn't get her way she does this high pitched scream.  I don't like this so much and am working fearlessly to help her to use her words so we can get through this phase quickly.  She loves to stand at the table when she eats.  She will give anyone a good stare down.  She has learned not to smile at these times which makes the stare down that much funnier.  Simply put.  She is a joy!

I am so grateful to be her Mother!

But...........

It has come to my attention that my children are becoming debaters.

I ask them to put a toy away. 

"But I didn't take it out!" 

"Really!?  I am very much aware that you didn't take it out!  Will you please put it away for me?"

"BuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuT! I didn't take it out!"

"Wrong answer , this is where you say... Oh yes I would be more than happy to put that toy away for you, my most wonderful mother who birthed me and then nursed me for 12(+) months, 3 of which you said you thought your nipples were going to fall off because of thrush, and has taken care of my every need for so long, it would be the least I could do."

Child stares at you and then catches on somewhat and says

"Fine I guess I will put the toy away"

"Oh thank you so much, for being soooo willing to help!"

But what you really say in your head is "You better say fine,child,  because I am sick and tired of listening to you complain to me about the injustice of you helping me with things that you think your siblings should be helping me with.  So help me, I am going to lose it one of these days!"


Just saying, some days are better than others!

TOFW-Phoenix

I get to be a "Time Out For Women" team member for this years event in Phoenix.  I am so excited to help spread the word to help women of all faiths come and participate in this uplifting and gratifying experience.  If you are interested in buying tickets let me know and I can help you get a group discount of $10 off the price.

I went last year right after we moved here.  I got to go with my sister Wendy, and it was so worth my time.  Here is a link for who the presenters will be here in Phoenix http://deseretbook.com/timeout/event/156

A Servicing We Go

A couple of months ago I felt this strong need to find ways for our family to increase our efforts to be involved in service opportunities for our community.   I went to http://www.volunteermatch.org/ , I put in a few key words and, bada bing bada boom, I found this wonderful organization.

I was drawn to this organization for many reasons.  One of the main reasons stems from their mission statement which is this :

"Family homelessness is damaging to everyone it touches. Save the Family empowers families to conquer homelessness and achieve life-long independence.

• • •

We envision communities free
from family homelessness."

I love the fact that they are striving to help families to know how to be proactive in the choices they make, enabling them to better understand how they can conquer, as they put it, homelessness and achieve independence.  

They have this program that asks for volunteers to bring in sack lunches, snacks and sack dinners on a daily basis for the families they are helping.  I was drawn to this particular program because it was easy for me to know how I could involve the children in this service.  And this morning we were able to put all the planning into action.

The younger girls helped me make the bread the past couple of weeks.  This morning everyone was able to have a hand in putting together the sack dinners.  Lucy helped with putting the cheese sticks in, Kady the dessert, Sera the carrots, Emma chips, Kady and Lucy sandwiches to dad to put in the bag, Eliza was the cheerleader.  I made 15 peanut butter and jelly, 15 ham and 10 chicken salad.  It was so exciting for me to see the girls be excited to help those who may be struggling temporally right now.  

For scripture study this morning we just read one verse, because I did not take into account how long it would take to put all of the sack dinners together.  Nonetheless it was one that came to my mind quickly, and it fit the mood of the morning.  It is from one of our standard works.  From The Book of Mormon  

Mosiah chapter 2 verse 17 

"And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."

Whatever struggles we may have as individuals or families, I have found that one of the easiest ways to find a  solution to, or lighten those burdens or struggles is to reach beyond ourselves and help those who may be struggling themselves.  At least, that has been my experience.  

On another note.  I was watching a program this afternoon while little people were still sleeping.  The programs title was family dinner time.  The guest was a lady who apparently is a guru on helping families have  more meaningful dinner time.  As I listened to the host and guest speak, I thought how I have been doing what they were talking about since before I even got married.  I had a very prideful moment.I even called Jared and told him that he married a genius! Here is a link to my post I did a long while ago about meal planning  It is well worth looking at, mostly for the funny movies.  Happy full moon!

p.s.  If anyone is interested in me doing a list of meals we eat here for your own meal planning idea, or even a more detailed approach to how I organize meal planning let me know.

Princess Ballet

Lat night the 4 older girls and I went to the Ballet with my Step- Mom and one of my nieces.  The girls had such a great time. I was so impressed with Kady's ability to be so attentive to the performance.  She even seemed to understand when the end was drawing near of an act and would get her hands ready in anticipation to clap.  So cute!


We got to go back stage afterwards and the girls got to meet some of the main characters. 

This picture is from my step moms phone. 

On the way home we talked about the performance.  We talked about how the boy ballerina's costumes were a bit distracting for them.  Emma said it was AK(higher voice inflect)WARD(lower voice inflect)  I got a chuckle out of their embarrassment, as I could see myself back when I was a younger girl.

As you can see in the picture they wore their princess dress ups.  Grandma Palmer made all of them for birthday presents, except Kady's.  We got Kady's at a garage sale.

My attempts at cleaning the home yesterday were fruitless.  It seemed that if I started cleaning something I would be sidelined with little people doing mischievous little things.  Like painting themselves with play makeup and nail polish.  I thought I had gotten rid of all of the nail polish and makeup from Emma and Sera's beauty kits they bought last week.  Oh well!

I decided it was not worth it to clean.  Instead we made some more bread for our service project we will be doing on Monday.  More on that Monday.

The girls had so much fun "forming" their loaves.  I learned a new trick from good ole BYUtv the night before.  To get any air bubbles out of your loaf you are forming you slap in down on the counter.  Eliza especially liked throwing her loaf down.  The loaves were not perfectly formed but at least I know they literally had a hand in helping with making the food for this service project we will be doing.

I played basketball this morning.  I have not played since just before I got pregnant with Daniel.  My lungs got a good stretch today.  The women I played with were so much fun and I look forward to playing again next week.  I think it would be good if I practiced my shot sometime this week.  I had forgotten the finesse you need when shooting the ball and may have over shot or under shot my share.  But I did have plenty of perfect shots that went in so gracefully. 

Today the girls all worked so hard in getting our home ready for the Sabbath.  I find that cleaning goes so much better if I am there guiding them along. This is very tedious for me. Repetition is the key.  And a lot of fake smiling.    I know that one day they will just automatically do these things naturally.  This thought helps me to persevere  through these formative years.  Because frankly when you help some children, what you really feel like doing is pounding your head against a wall.  But fake smiling works better for me. 

We got to go to my Dad's tonight.  It was sort of a time to say good bye to my Step brother, his wonderful wife and their son.  They are some of the best people I know.  We did a BBQ.  I love BBQ's so much, especially the combinations of hamburger's, hot dogs, potato salad, and baked beans.  It is so magical to my taste buds.  Really I could eat this meal at least once a week, if  I didn't know how unhealthy it is. 

Here are some pictures from today

 When I was going through Daniels clothes today the girls found a shade hat for him and decided to put it on him.  I just let the picture tell how he may be feeling.

 Eliza insisted on having goggles to wear.  If you click on the picture you will see how they distort her eyes and ears. 

 Then she would flip those goggles up

 So cute and funny

 Emma enjoying the swimming

 Kady enjoyed wearing goggles too!

 Miss Lucy right after coming out.

Eliza demonstrating perfect form! 

Bleeping Out The "D" Word Can Be Tricky

So I think I may have been experiencing some depression since we decided to load our lives up in Michigan and head on over here to the beautiful land of the sun.

I have thought a lot about the "D" word for a while now.  The other day I was reading a fellow bloggers post on the subject of depression here.    I realized that some of what she talked about is what I have been experiencing.  Especially the thought of something is not right. 

I think I am having a hard time processing everything that happened in such a short time.  Especially with our move.  I kept on telling myself to just focus on getting everything done, that I think I missed out on being able to put some adequate closure on that chapter of my life. 

I am not sure on how to do that now, so that is why I am writing about it. I know there will be a time when I have found how to make that closure happen and I will have figured out how to move on. 


The kind of depression I think I am experiencing is that I am not sure how to connect with this new environment I am in now.  I find myself asking who am I?  Do I fit in here?   It's like I am the new kid at a school and I still have not found where I fit in.



I know I am on the road to bleeping out the "D" word. I look forward to getting to that point.  I am just not sure what avenue to take.  I have never been one to be depressed, but I do know that I feel generally off.

So for me I ask myself-- is it just the fact that a whole lot of change happened all at once in a very small period of time, or am I chemically imbalanced?  I don't concretely have the answer to those questions yet.


What do you do to help bleep out the "D" word?  If you have had similar experiences I would appreciate some feedback.

A day of rest

Tuesday was spent finishing up the the bits and pieces of organizing what I wasn't able to get to Monday.  I just intertwined that with just relaxing.  It was nice.  Very needed after the very productive day I had on Monday.  I am a big advocate for rest when it is needed.

I went to the store after I got the kids to bed, and before volleyball.  At one of the stores, I was trying to get some strawberries that were on sale.  Ones that were not moldy like the ones that they had out.  The produce guy was called to help.  This older man comes out.  This is the conversation we had:

Produce Guy (PG)- What can I help you with?

Me- I was wondering if you had any fresh 3# packages of strawberries in the back?

PG- Nope!  I just put out the last of what we had an hour ago

Me- Okay thanks

PG- Do you want to come in the back and see for yourself?

Me- Oh no, I trust you!

PG- Are you sure?

Me-Yes!

PG-  I was just trying to get you in the back (moving his brow up and down as to suggest he wanted to make some advances)

Me- insert nervous laugh-

PG- Will that be all?

Me- Yes, thank you!

Interesting to say the least.  I don't think I will be asking for the produce guy at that store for a while.

At volleyball tonight, we pretty much played for 2 hour s straight.  I told Jared that there was not one spot on my body that didn't hurt, when I got home.

He massaged my feet, as I just laid like a log on the bed.  He is so good to me.  Bonus is that he is sexy!

Today I am going and getting adjusted at our wonderful Chiropractors.  We love him!  Then i will spend the morning at my sisters. 

My brother-in-law and sister-in-law spent their night at the hospital.  He fainted last night when getting ready for bed, and cut his head in the process.  The docs say that it is some kind of summer flu thing that's been going around here.  They are home now, but still have 5 kids to take care of.  calls have been made and help is on the way. 

Lucy and Eliza came in this morning around 6:30 with their bathing suits.  For some reason the squirrels in their heads told them that I said we would be going swimming today.  They misunderstood, because we will be going swimming on Saturday.  They seemed disappointed.  Disappointment is okay.

Alright, I am off to save the world.  Have a fabulous day!

Blow it out your old wazoo!

I have been busy all day organizing and shifting food storage stuff.  It has been a great work out.  I carried about 34 cases each filled with #10 canned food.  Most of it was wheat.  Some was, dehydrated carrots and apples, oatmeal, rice, beans, dry milk and sugar.  I had been storing most of it in our guest bedroom closet, which could be a room in and of itself.  I never dreamed I would have so much space, ever! 

The girls were such a big help when I needed it. 

So to my title.  I wake up around 4:45 in the morning to get ready to go walking/jogging with my friend.  We meet around 5:25ish.  I wake this early so I can have time to feed Daniel before I leave so I don't feel like I have two extra jugs to carry.

I use my husbands fancy cell phone for my alarm.  He is so kind to set it for me every night.  Apparently last night he forgot to set it.  But that is okay because he apparently has his own alarm clock in the form of a loud trumpeting toot-toot that comes out his old wazoo.  When he had awoken himself he saw the time, which was just before the alarm would have gone off.  He checked the alram and saw it was not set. 

I was unaware of this until I had come back from walking and  he told me of this tender mercy, as he called it. I thanked Heavenly Father for such a humorous tender mercy.

Two for One

This will be a quick entry.

Yesterday I got to help out at the school book fair.  I had a blast watching kids come up with only a few coins in their hand and then asking if this was enough to buy the handful of books they were holding in their other hand.  I told them that today was not their lucky day and that it was not enough.  They always looked puzzeled.  It had made laughing inside every time.  Gotta love kids! 

Emma helped her friend out today.  On the way to school her friend went to look back while riding her bike to school and got to close to that edge of the path and fell onto her handle of the bike.  Emma first thought to go to get her friends mother but then she says "Mom I had a strong feeling to not go to her Mom but to a friends(name being withheld) home that was closer.  So I listened.  I knew that was the Holy Ghost telling me what to do!"  There's more to that story but this is a quick entry :)

I was so grateful that she heeded those promptings.  This was one of those times where I felt so happy we have talked about on so many occasions to our children, the importance of listening to those promptings we get.  Her friend was taken home and all is well!

After the girls got home from school we headed out to my sisters.  Her second daughter was the empress in The emperors new clothes.  It was the epitome of a play full of beginner actresses and actors.  I loved it!  My niece was very good at actually putting some kind of emotion into her delivery and I was very appreciative of that.  Especially since 99% of her fellow cast members did the same monotone influx in their voices.  I tried adding some pep to a few of their songs they sang by clapping my hands to the beat, but no one else seemed to catch onto my vision.  So after a few awkward times of trying I stopped.

Today was filled with fun.  My brother-in law took 5 of the younger kids to Home Depot to make a mother's day gift for Wendy and I.  Jared stayed and helped clean their home and then my sister, her 2 older girls and Emma went out.  We took the girls to lunch. 

On our way back home we stopped at Costco.  Enough said on that.

We made eggo waffles for dinner.  They are on sale right now at costco for 5.99 for a 60 count.  Yes I stocked up, and yes my freezer is now 1/4 full of them.  It looked like the sign said the sale goes until May29th. 

Jared has cleaned our home and it smells wonderful!  The girls asked me what I want for breakfast tomorrow morning.  I actually told them I would not like them to make me breakfast and that in fact I do not want anyone to come in and wake me up, but rather to have them help their father later that day to make me a delicious dinner and cookies.  If the day is going to be to celebrate me I want a say in how I want it to be celebrated.  I think I will ban the whole breakfast thing on the sheer moral that THIS IS THE ONE DAY I WANT TO SLEEP IN AND GOSH DARN IT I DESERVE IT!  That's all. 

I am looking forward to all of the special love I will get tomorrow.  Real quick before I sign off.  The music leader for our primary in our congregation, she called Friday morning and wanted to record me singing my favorite primary song.  She said last year she did this for Mother's day and then the kids had to guess whose mother was singing the song.  Such a brilliant idea!  My kids will definetly get mine.  Here are the words to the song I sang

"I want to be kind"  slightly adapted by me

I want to be kind to everyone
For that is right you see

So I say to myself
SELF
remember this
kindness begins with me

I sing this ALL THE TIME!

And now for a special tribute to a few special people who if it were not for them I would not be the mother I am to the children I have.

 My maternal grandparents

 My husbands maternal grandmother

 My in-laws

 My paternal grandmother

 My husbands paternal grandmother

 My Mother

 My Dad

Happy Mother's Day!

The Path

My walking partner this morning was sick.  So after feeding Daniel I plopped back to bed at 5:25 with my work out clothes on and sneakers.  I fell right back to a deep sleep with no covers on. An hour and 20 minutes later I woke up. 

I told Jared that I felt like I hadn't slept that good in a while.  After the 2 older girls left for school I got the rest of us ready for an adventure.  We have some beautiful paths and trails in our neighborhood so I figured since I was still in my work out clothes I would use my new hand me down free jogging stroller I got from a friend.  Eliza and Daniel rode in the stroller while Lucy and Kady rode their bikes.  Kady actually has been using one of our self made balance bikes. 

We were off.  The sun was nice and warm.  I could feel my bottom reminding me how far I have to go till I don't get whip lash from it when I run.  And I could see in my shadow to the west of me how bouncy it is.  It just gave me more motivation to move.  Lucy took off and was far ahead of us.  I got really nervous at one point because apart of the path goes under one of the main roads and it is a fairly steep hill, especially for a little rider.

I prayed real hard that if she did go down that hill that she would be protected, or to help her to remember to stop to wait for us.  Kady was my buddy.  She had to stop frequently to tell how hot she was or to move her hair out of the way of her eyes.  Her helmet kept on shifting her hair.  I encouraged her along the way.

I was so relieved to find Lucy waiting patiently for us to go down the hill.  They walked their bikes down.  After passing the 2 underground parts of the paths we came to a part of the path where on one side were bigger rocks that went down a small drop off, and on the other was nice soft sand.  Kady kept looking down when she was riding and would move uncomfortably close to the drop off which put me on edge.  I reminded several times how she needed to stay from the edge and how unsafe it is.  She would redirect her course and move to a safer place on the path.

About a mile and a half into the path there is a little play area.  We made a stop to play and refuel ourselves.  The sprinklers were on.  Lucy say's to me "Why can't we go in the sprinklers?"  I said "because you just said you couldn't!"  She then realized she needed to rephrase her question and asked " May we play in the sprinklers?"  ABSOLUTELY!, I replied 

They had a blast running cooling off.  Eliza was not too keen on the idea so she watched from a  distance.  After a nice refuel we loaded back up and headed back home on the path.  Again Kady was somhow drawn to that dangerous edge.  It finally dawned on me to get down to her level and look her in the eyes and explain why I needed her to stay on the safer side.  She did not have anymore issues for the remainder of the ride.

When it came time for the path to under the road instead of walking this time they rode their bikes the whole time.  I prayed so hard that they would be safe, and they were.  I was so thankful.  We we got home we were all so hot and sweaty.  But we had such a great time.

I have thought about this all day.  How the whole path thing is related to our lives.  Do I complain about my journey or do I embrace it?  Am I careless in my actions or thoughts to bring me close to those dangerous drop offs?   Am I staying focused on what is most important or am I focusing on things that don't matter.  Am I proactively making efforts to re-balance which path I am on?  How I have a loving Heavenly Father who is quietly encouraging me to keep on going and don't give up and believing Him and trusting what He tells me? 

Our paths are all different.  Some have lots of curves and others lots of hills.  Some have beautiful trees and wildlife while others have barrenness.  What do I do to help others when they hit a bump on their path?  Am I willing to help when needed? 

I feel like the more I make time to listen in those quiet moments of reflection I realize how much energy I use up in worrying about small stuff that in the grand scheme of things really doesn't matter.  And then it is as if I get a better understanding of  how I can do better and am instructed on how to correct the path I am on that will keep me farther away from those drop offs and closer to those sandy softer banks.  And then sometimes there are times where a hill comes and the answer is to just ride it out and trust.  I love introspection. 

Pictures that were taken almost a year ago in Michigan

We finished our day off with the girls getting in their swim suits and having a mud party in the back.  It reminded me of their mud sliding they did at our Michigan home.  Oh by the way we had an offer on our home and it looks like the mortgage company is going to take it!!!  We just need to wait for paper work stuff.  One mortgage sounds much better than two.  Happy Cino de Mayo!

Conversations in my head

 I found the camera and took a picture of Emma's eyelids today.  She told me that when she was returning something to the office today the nurse asked her if her eyes were okay.  Emma told her she had  put on eye stuff yesterday.  The nurse suggested to her that I should take her to the local drug store to get some eye makeup removal.  Not going to happen.  If good ole soap and water can't get it off then it aint coming off. 

Today I had to draw upon those inner conversations to the max, because I had plenty of opportunities to freak out if I wanted to.  Some of them would included,but not limited to,  3 little ones at a bathroom sink they had just filled to the brim with water and then taking many barbie dolls and other small toys and were sloshing them about.  I took a BIG deep breath in, and screamed to myself that water damage was not taking place or any other kind of damage.  Well, except brain damage, since I have reminded repeatedly that the combination of toys+water+bathrooms do not go together.

I only said, with teeth gritting and my mouth perched slightly open "This is not a good choice!"

Ken's leg was damaged when I was shaking him out of water, his leg hit the sink.  So now he is a one legged, tattoed guy.  Some child had drawn circles around his arms.  At least he always has a smile on his face.


Let's see, another one would be that Sera complained the entire time she emptied the dishwasher.  That would not have been bad had she emptied the dishwasher in 5 minutes like it normally would take.  But she took almost 2 hours.  I nearly flipped on this one, but instead went to time out in my room several time to avoid me taking control and doing it myself.

This morning before school the kids were running around and Emma was carring Eliza doing somewhat of a horse trot thingy and she dropped Eliza on her head.  I went to my pantry and shut the door and screamed at the top of my lungs.  When I opened the door I had 5 little girls standing there asking what I was doing in there.  I told them I was letting some air out.  Kady said "you okay Mom?"

 Daniel recently started sucking his thumb.  I think he is a very proactive child.  He must have gotten sick of waiting for me to feed him and figured sticking his thumb in his mouth could help soothe him while he waits for me to help everyone else.  He is such a great little person.

Today the dominant conversation in my head was "Why do I even have the kids do anything?  It would be so much easier if I did everything because I know it would be done the way I would do it and as fast as I would want it done!"  So I answered myself, because I don't like to leave myself hanging,  "Indeed it would be easier, but that is missing the point.  "I know!"  I replied back to myself. And I sigh. "Why can't they just get it?  Why don't they want to just get it done so they can go and play and have fun?  Why drag it out?  Come on people!" 

 At least my bread turned out wonderfully.  Kady and Lucy helped me.  We did that for school today.  We talked about the importance of the different ingredients and if you mess up the ingredients then it would be gross.   It was soooooo good!  Who would have thought that accidentally adding 1 extra tablespoon would make such a huge difference. We took a loaf over to our neighbors and I even shared some with a couple of traveling sales men who were trying to sell me some freezer dried food storage stuff. Lucky them! 

 todays               yesterdays

 Eliza pooped 10 times today.  10 times!!!! I think that is an all time high record.  I am beginning to think she may have gotten a parasite from drinking the water table water she sat in.  I thought it was teething but it has been a few days.  She sticks all sorts of gross things in her mouth.

We didn't eat dinner until 7pm.  That very rarely happens, but I told the girls I was not able to make dinner until they got the dishes done.  While I was getting dinner stuff prepped the girls all got bathed.  We had waffles with bacon and eggs.  Lucy and Kady cut up strawberries to top the waffles with.  It was delicious!  Emma and Sera decided to take their time in getting ready after their bath so they missed out on  helping cut up strawberries.  I am confident that one of these days it will sink in their heads that with certain things taking your time does not pay off.  At least that is one of the conversations I like to have in my head.